All the absurd business ideas

Every idea on this site has its own page, so you can read it, share it and argue about it. They are in no particular order, and none of them is a good idea.

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  1. Sell weekly forecasts for yesterday's weather. Accuracy is guaranteed.
  2. Open a library of unread books. Visitors are not required to read them.
  3. Offer professional waiting at traffic lights on behalf of busy drivers.
  4. Rent out a quiet Monday morning to people who need one.
  5. Sell homemade fog by the cubic meter.
  6. Start a subscription service for a single raindrop, delivered monthly.
  7. Charge a fee to say "I'll think about it" on someone's behalf.
  8. Launch a reminder app whose only reminder is to open the other reminder app.
  9. Sell fully assembled flat-pack furniture. Instructions included for nostalgia.
  10. Open a gym where the equipment is one very heavy chair.
  11. Offer a home-visit service in which someone agrees with your opinions.
  12. Sell certificates proving you were on time.
  13. Create a luxury line of ordinary pebbles. Each one is unique, like all pebbles.
  14. Provide wake-up calls in the voice of a mildly disappointed relative.
  15. Start a taxi service for people who would like to be dropped off nearby.
  16. Sell left gloves only. Right gloves are sold separately, eventually.
  17. Open a pop-up shop that sells the idea of a pop-up shop.
  18. Charge by the hour for staring thoughtfully out of a window.
  19. Offer a service that sends a thumbs-up to every message you do not want to answer.
  20. Sell a clock that is right twice a day, with a certificate stating which times.
  21. Rent out an umbrella that is held next to you, but not over you.
  22. Create a newsletter that consists only of the unsubscribe link.
  23. Start a bakery that sells yesterday's bread at today's prices, with a story.
  24. Open a bureau that issues permits for short walks.
  25. Offer lessons in standing in an elevator while facing the correct direction.
  26. Sell a jar of assorted Wi-Fi passwords from places you will never visit.
  27. Start a courier service that delivers promises, tracking number included.
  28. Rent out a stack of important-looking papers to people entering a meeting.
  29. Create a gym for muscles you did not know you had.
  30. Sell spare time by the minute, slightly used.
  31. Open a restaurant where every dish is called the dish of the day.
  32. Offer a daily pep talk delivered in a monotone.
  33. Sell a houseplant that is already in the process of being forgotten.
  34. Start a record label for the sound of other people's refrigerators.
  35. Charge people to guess what is inside a sealed box that is empty.
  36. Launch a dating app that matches people by their shared fear of replying.
  37. Sell tickets to a meeting that has already ended.
  38. Offer professional checking-if-the-stove-is-off services, remote.
  39. Create a coffee mug that stays warm only while you are not looking.
  40. Open a hat shop that sells exclusively the hat you are already wearing.
  41. Provide a subscription to one new Tuesday every month.
  42. Rent out an old idea to be reused by a new idea.
  43. Sell reflective vests to people who want to be noticed by traffic.
  44. Start a podcast about silent retreats.
  45. Open a hotel where the check-out is the only available activity.
  46. Sell the shadow of a famous building, to scale.
  47. Offer a hotline for people who need to hear a friendly stranger say "typical".
  48. Create a clothing line that looks the same in every season.
  49. Start a moving company that moves things slightly to the left.
  50. Charge for gently clearing your throat before an important announcement.